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Here are the 15 most probable reasons behind your wifes lack of interest in intimacy. Not many people enter their senior years wit an active sex life, some do, but not many. That has been HER normal. Thats abusive and hurtful too. Plus, a lack of communication might have created this distance. In some cases, this can escalate intopostpartum depression, which is a common reason why many women experience a lack of sexual desire after childbirth. They think they do, Men expect women to get hormone therapy to fix the hormone problem. Thats great but what about the man? If not he should go on in it. I am so angry at him too!!! He feels unwanted or unappreciated. I hope that she too will woo me, always, as well. The fact that she cant be bothered to take a few minutes in the shower to manually make things right tells you everything you need to know. Really connect. Nothing is out of bounds! Tired of initiating intimacy? Mayo clinic advises to avoid, because they are not FDA approved and because they didn;t go the pathway of long term human trials are to be avoided. It will resotre his body as well and make you hapoier. 10 years of this and going on5 years since last try, dont sleep in same be, snoring medical issues up down. Wife won't touch me sexually | Talk About Marriage // Replace PAGE_URL with your page's canonical URL variable While some of the underlying factors can be weeded out with the right approach and mindset, others can be more damaging to the entire relationship. Not fun! From so many different angles I cannot begin to list. If you have always been the one to initiate intimacy in your relationship, take a step back and tell her how sexy you think it would be for her to be the one to reach out. When it gone, its gone. Wtf are we supposed to do when our spouse doesnt want to make love? Our world is obsessed with sex and without understanding the unity of compassion, respect, close bonds after many years of being together. She wanted me to be sexual with her, but would not reciprocate. We have been married 38 years, and we love each other very much. I love him and still desire him (even though he lost his hair and gained a gut!!) Absolute rubbish! When home I was to do whatever he wanted me to. At 45 years old I met this man Sorry. People might think Im lonely but Im not, I work alone and I get all the right answers talking to my self. She has the house and I have my private place seperate from the main house. We are all just CroMagnon reborn. 11 Signs Your Boyfriend Isn't Interested In You Sexually Anymore Your situation is my situation ! Nothing, I mean nothing, kills a relationship, a marriage, a union, more thoroughly than complacency and boredom. My husband and I separated recently. Talk to your wife about the lack of intimacy, 11 Lovely Ways To Date Your Spouse Spice Up YourMarriage, 200 Newlywed Game Questions For That Instant Bonding, 45 Questions To Ask Your Husband For A Heart-To-Heart Conversation, Why Is Marriage Important? If you deny one you put a wall around the other. Peace. Many seniors are in the same situation and we feel your pain. And lastly, dont discount masturbation as a solution. Im 65 and he is 74. Its been a slow process in development, heading to the place we have arrived in our relationship. Now that you know that this could also be the reason why your wife avoids physical contact, you need to be her rock and convince her that you still think shes as beautiful as the day when you first met her. BTWsome in your wifes position build great insurmountable resentment. Want to have a happier, healthier marriage? I desire foreplay and intimacy, not just intercourse. I urge you to seek help now. If both parties dont want to change things (and only one does) then unfortunately the situation is probably doomed. If your wife is going to have any appropriate romance in her life, its going to come from you. The good news is: there are plenty of ways to banish problems in the bedroom and rekindle the fire with your wife. The only thing I have now is masturbation about 3 times a week. I go where I want and do my own thing, theres no where are you going, screaming and name calling. Behind heart broken!!! But its not worth destroying something that you took years to build. Look, I am an RN and living with a man who is 5 years older than me. Life is way too short! There are many causes, physical and emotional, why your wife wont have sex with you anymore. I have joint custody with my ex. My wife and my sex life was pretty damn good before she developed breast cancer and had a double mastectomy, even though she went through early menopause (in her 40s). Prostate cancer or vaginal dryness does not preclude you from meeting the sexual needs of your partner out of laziness and a lack of giving a shit. For a woman, as she ages, she needs time to get into that sexual mindset and anticipation is a great aphrodisiac. I just had to click on this to see how times have changed. And there is another problem: When two people dont want the same things in the marriage or relationship (like trying to fix what is wrong), then there is often no solution other than plodding along as before. I love her to death, but Im sick of the constant rejection. In recent times, our sex life has begun to resemble our early 20s again, even better because contraception is in the rearview mirror. Regardless of the reason your wife has pulled away from you, you must confront the situation. Or when she does get in the mood again 45 minutes to get hard and going and he is done like always within a minute and he rolls over and goes to sleep. Am I ugly? A dip in intimacy can be brought on by several factors new responsibilities, changing priorities, biological and physiological changes. Its a disturbing trap that you must avoid. My husband and I have been married 6 years. We were easy pickings since that biological clock was ticking louder and she still hadnt landed Chad. Ive been led to believe Im the selfish one for thinking of leaving just over sex. If you must you could think castration out of love. Holding on and hoping we can work it out, for now Im giving him space. Im in my 70s now and dont care any more, hes retired and works in his shop on cars mostly. Im so confused. Any discussion goes nowhere. var disqus_config = function () { Ive been thinking about wanting a second child seven years after I gave birth to our first one. I am 60 soon and dread having to try and start again. But I do it, why? Sadly so, leave! . Your wife avoids intimacy because she feels neither desirable nor sexy. "Feeling expected to have sex a certain way, or feeling like you need to have intercourse if you explore desire with your partner, can actually strangle a woman's libido over time.". Your wife may simply just not want sex as regularly as you do, and she may not even know how important sex is to you. 15 Signs Your Wife Doesn't Love You Anymore - Luvze If hes not willing to seek medical help and take pills to be able to have sex, the frustration amd resentment will be so much. So now a hug one a day (maybe) and pecks on lips when leaving house. She is intelligent and knows exactly what is going on. Seems like you do not really love your husband any more. Now its gotten where I cant get hard when Im with her, Im sure its mental causes. She is somewhat stressed by the reduction in lifestyle we have been reduced to, after years of six figure income for both of us. Hmmm. My 76 year old husband has not. We have no children. Im just trying to talk to her and it pisses her off anytime I bring it up Im tired of masturbating two to three times a week so I can focus on the everyday things Im going on 33 years of marriage and this started at 15 years. Someday I might take a sex vacation overseas. Take your time and show your wife youre not in a hurry. i feel for you my spouse stopped being interested in sex 20 years ago at my age 51,for many years we had some extrem arguments and are still having them,,, to no avail what do you do. Should they swallow it just to make you feel good? Your story is very very simular to mine. I need love that bad to hang on to a partner that never wants sex? Its not always the woman who has no interest. Makes me feel worth lessnot worthless.worth. If shes got a spouse who is extremely suspicious, shes not going to feel trusted or respected. But the giving up on relationship and each other is what happens. . I felt like she just gave me away to anyone emotionally and physically. My Wife Doesn't Want Me Sexually (My Wife Never Touches Me Anymore) Get a better paying job so she doesnt have to work her butt off. She know eccatly what shes doing. My opinion only, so, most likely only worthy in my estimation. Too much trouble. We dont have children, and we have tried everything.therapy, books, scheduling sex, talking, crying, toys, porn. Women fall in love with their husbands have kids and having kids taking care of the kids 99.99% and working full time or taking some class to better your job. Semi handsome for an old guy. The difference is that men feel selfish and entitled, as if sex is only for their pleasure, something women do for them, hence the phrase put out. But how does that viewpoint help you find happiness in life? I so badly need a woman I love her to death but cant stand to be around her anymore. I hope to eventually meet another same sex partner willing to take her time and see what works. Do this without the expectation of sexual intimacy. Richard C Quite frankly, I feel like he has been and is being cheated. More men need to leave their wives when they wont have sex with them. I have what may be slight ED..but offered to stimulate and play at sex often..there are some really fun marital Thats it, you said it thats what the woman loves. Glenn, as a man to another man; its time to let that person go. It breaks my heart because we are so happy together in every other way, but I need the physical intimacy and to be desired and sex is something I enjoy and I feel like he is withholding it. 2 weeks later I spoke to her again and ended up asking if she knew what I was suggesting. Marriage is hard work, but worth every moment when the effort is reciprocated. As far as the guy I liked, nothing ever came of it. Divorce? This could be a reason why your wife avoids sex. My wife and I hadnt had sex for more than a year. Not only may this put her off being intimate, but you may be setting yourself and your wife up for a stressful encounter. They need not be. We just share our acerage, her in the house and I have a place with my dettached out building. But did you notice that men have to make the first move? I knew I had to do something. Some doctors will prescribe testosterone and advise DHEA supplementation. Then menopause dried it out and the muscles resist and joints spasm, so its painful. I felt rejected at times, but I learned that what postpartum moms go through physically and emotionally is intense. And LATINA. Havent had regular sex in years, just a HJ or BJ on 8 or 9 month intervals typically. I get it and don't want to add to her stress. I have rekindled a relationship that ended over fifty years ago with a woman I dated right before I met my wife. Why waste your money and time on hookerd? If the marriage has made you take your personal hygiene for granted, this lax attitude could be a total turn-off for her. What does it mean when your wife doesn't show affection? We lose ourselves. It may also be helpful for her to speak with her doctor to see if there are other treatment options that might help. It takes two. She put in over $300K on our $1M house and I told her we may need to sell it when my youngest graduates high school. Should a wife forsake any of these advantages for the principle of equality? messages where she was being flirtatious to a local musician . What we have Ive worked very hard to achieve. Research published by the National Marriage Project found that couples who make time for date night experience benefits, such as increased sexual satisfaction, improved communication skills, and injecting excitement and passion back into their relationship. And I cook, shop for food, take care of dogs and have. I cant make the same wages I did before my illness, but added to my retirement money, it can get close. Well, its clearly only getting worse. I am 79 and my wife is 75 and our sex life is as good as ever. I only wrote this, to just say it. Both Men and women slow down there sex drive but women sex drive is so on the back burner and frankly they dont care about mens sex drive needs. I was going to say you lucky lucky bastard., Maybe let her pick the sex partner and she may want to be a side participant in it, could always ask : ), Its been13 years no sex for me.lbeen married42 years..her phone and internet are more important than me. My wife of 35 years and I have always had difficulty sexually. I would be gone before dark! I have done the majority of housework including doing the major role of raising our children from Pre school to leaving home. Affection (hold hands, rub shoulders, tap butt, arm around shoulder, hugs, kisses, winks, that special look, etc), compliments, please, thank you, inside jokes, cheerleader, cleaning, cooking, repairs, child rearing, activities together, exercise together, etc will go a long way to leading to sex again. (d.head || d.body).appendChild(s); Her vagina is dry as a bone and she doesnt like penetration at all, either from me or her own fingers. bcb Now married to number 3. I am going to be 42 years old!! So, before you start saying things like, My wife never touches me anymore, and misunderstand the problem that youre actually facing, its vital that you try to focus more on why your wife never initiates physical contact. Took my wife to Paris, on our 25th wedding anniversary and rented the most romantic flat next to the Eiffel Tower. Im throwing my partner out the door due to his rants and anger over lack of sex. . We had sex once last year and it had been a while prior to that, but she told me that due to the pain and all, she doesnt want to do it any more. I am very hormonal being athletic and take DHEA supplements which enhance desire. She knows this but never initiates. It's a horrible feeling to want sex, but not want it with your partner. That leaves us with so many perverts running around today inept at forming a real relationship, fantasy is in sadly. I would like to ask her if well ever have a sex life again, but she has a hard time talking about it. I think the resolve here is to tell the parent who is confiding in you to seek professional help, and then bud out. . You're correct about that. Because we always hear guys complaining! After reading this feed, thanks for sharing stories but I know where dirty old man comes from, darn wives holding out! I agree, once they stop theres nothing thats going to get them interested or willing to do it again. My wife is 54 and started menopause at 46. Is your husband on HRT as well? I was too vain and just average. If you are not communicating about this, nothing will change. You begin to see the problem. He doesbt accept the limitations of my back injury. Then extreme back problems thru me into disability. 17) She doesn't try to make you feel better anymore. While its good to get to the root of the problem so you can resume a healthy, happy relationship, checking in with yourself is also good. If theyve been fighting the whole day, physical intimacy is the last thing on their mind. I understand the frustration, I have tried talking with my wife and have even said, if the problem was with me, I would be in a doctors office tomorrow! When we go out, all I see are happy couples who show affection and love. Damn was I a dumbass. Since I dont know your wife and I dont know anything about your conversational style or hers, I cant give you the magic words for getting the conversation started. No, on a serious note, it wasnt something to have posted here. Advice | Ask Damon: My wife doesn't want to have sex anymore He is selfish, lazy and quite frankly a self absorbed narcissist. Think of the biblical verse Ecclesiastes 3. Is it honestly your right to be given sex however your wife can give it? A study published by the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that women had more difficulty staying focused during intimacy and lower arousal levels when under stress. Having married one of the well into that 34% is hell. When theres a disconnect and communication gaps that lead to resentment, the hostility will make itself apparent in some way or the other, says Gopa. But his belly sticks out a lot and makes it extremely difficult to get in because of 3 things. Ive tried to convey this, but without success. What to Do When Your Husband Doesn't Want You Sexually - Marriage Females are elevated to the superior status of the male they pair with the reverse is not true receive the protection and provisioning of that male, and enjoy the primary bond with the children.